masquerade

“If we claim we have no sin, we are only fooling ourselves and not living in the truth. But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness. If we claim we have not sinned, we are calling God a liar and showing that his word has no place in our hearts.”

1 John 1:8-10

My child,

I want you to live in the truth. Don’t try to fool yourself and others. There is no need to pretend. You sin every day. Even though I don’t want you to remain in your sin, I love you despite the choices you make.

See how the light outside your window illuminates your yard. I want you to receive the bright light of my truth into every crevice of the landscape of your heart and mind.  

There are places you don’t want anyone to see because you have deemed them too shameful. But you know I see it all, even, better than you do. Is there someone more important than me you are looking to impress?

 If I see it all, there is no need to posture for other humans who are full of flaws, also. Their shortcomings may not look like yours, but trust me, they have their issues.

Remember, I have made provision for all of your offenses. That is why I came to earth. Because I love you, I traded my perfect record for your tarnished one. It is my desire for you to be free from anything that hinders the way you (or others) experience my love.

I no longer count your failures and flaws against you. They have been erased because you received the gift of my righteousness through Christ.

Enjoy my glorious freedom today!

I love you,

Abba

My Abba,

I want to stop investing in the masquerade. I sometimes put on the righteous mask for you, sometimes for me, and sometimes for others. But I recognize all these pretense parades are foolish.

This pattern reminds me of my kids when they were toddlers. They would cover their eyes and exclaim, “Mommy, you can’t see me!” This childish behavior looked so much cuter when they did it, than when I try to do it with you.

Maybe it feels threatening to my self-esteem (confidence in my value) to admit my flaws. This is an interesting deception considering the truth I claim to believe: I am sinful and everything good about me is a gift from you.

Why then do I feel the need to play dress up? Am I striving for a better opinion poll? What will that get me? Am I looking for the praise of other sinners like me? Am I trying to trick others into believing I am better than I am?

If in my weakness you can show yourself strong, then I am trying to mask your strength when I pretend to be strong on my own. I sometimes attempt to disguise the chasm of my lack, instead of allowing you to transform it into a reservoir for your glory.

You can pour into me and I can become a display of your splendor. Or I can hide and preserve a painful hole in my heart.

Please give me the clarity to see my choice. Then I can ask for the grace to choose your strength amidst my weakness. I want to be free of all that hinders my (or anyone else’s) experience of your love.

I love you,

Mollie

photo: alphaspirit

mollie@mollieaxtell.com