Captivated

“At this point many of his disciples turned away and deserted him. Then Jesus turned to the Twelve and asked, ‘Are you also going to leave?’ Simon Peter replied, ‘Lord, to whom would we go? You have the words that give eternal life. We believe, and we know you are the Holy One of God.’” John 6:66-69

My Abba,

I would like to believe I always stand in the confidence Peter expresses in this passage. I would like to think I am always faithful to the truth that you are the only Source of life.

I would like to rest assured I will never go to anything or anyone else seeking to find that which you alone can give me. I would like to believe doubt won’t ever show its disturbing face on my doorstep.

But I want to live in reality. And reality paints a much less glowing picture of my life with you. Just like Peter, I make strong, convincing confessions of my love for you. And like Peter, I mean it. But also like Peter, I sometimes entertain lies about you and act accordingly.

Even though I have never made an audible, public confession denying you, my choices, actions and attitudes expose my heart. My feet can be staunchly faithful to your path one day and run renegade the next.

Please give me the rock-solid confidence and love for you that always cries out, “Lord, to whom would I go? You have the words that give eternal life. I know you are the Holy One of God.”

I love you,

Mollie

My child,

How many times have the following thoughts covertly crossed your mind?  “If you chase these things, they will satisfy you more than what God has for you. You are missing out.” 

Here is the untainted truth: Every time you make a choice to clutch at something other than my matchless plans for your life, you are grabbing a fist full of sand. It may feel momentarily warm and interesting in your hand, but it is not lasting and life-giving. Imagine it rushing to the ground through your fingers.  

These inferior things will attempt to sell you a dream, but when you wake, you will be left trying to rid yourself of the disappointing, gritty residue of misplaced expectations. 

Intellectually, you know it is impossible to be more satisfied with a life filled with what is inferior and ultimately less satisfying. Empowered by my love, I offer you an opportunity to participate in what is eternally significant and meaningful. I want you to thrive. I can’t help myself. That is who I am.

Let me cleanse your eyes from the smoke that obscures your view of me today. I want to wipe away the soot of your sin, so you can see me more clearly. My beauty is irresistible. If you catch a glimpse, you will be captivated. 

I love you,

Abba

photo: t.tomsickova